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Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Some Kiley Quotes and Other News

The great thing is that when Kiley grows out of the "funny quote phase,"  Marianna will have just begun...so the fun will continue. 

"Daddy, the sun is too close to us here.  I wish we were back in Norton!"  said Snack after the tiny amount of snow we were blessed with disappeared in a day.  She is also mad because we don't have anywhere to go sledding....oh the things that 5 year olds fret about.

"When I sit in the same spot for a long period of time, the house gets really quiet and I don't know where anyone is."  This one was texted to me via Greg....ah a quiet house.  What is that?  Where does she live?  I think she can block out sound.

"As a matter of fact, how do people get off a Ferris wheel?"  I have no context for that one...an out -of-the- blue Snack quote.

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Wal-Mart was the place to be today in Farm-Vegas.  Apparently everyone here is bracing for a blizzard to beat all records.  I just wanted stocking stuffers for Greg and Kiley and some milk (Mari Mari Quite Contrary drinks lots of bobbies and Mommy Mommy Nothing Rhymes With That has discovered that she can make a homemade latte in her microwave so we go through more milk than we used to...keep up the good work, cows!).

If there are no posts for a while, like a couple of weeks, don't worry.  I'm sure you all are used to the lack of posts...but if The Blizzard of 2010 hits, I won't be at work, and since we don't have Internet at home, I'll be disconnected from the world until returning to work next year.  Although...we won't be completely off the map, we are going to have TV again as of December 27.  Merry Christmas Greg! 

Monday, December 13, 2010

A Snow Filled Morning...

So, we don't have as much snow as those of you reading this in Wise County, but at least we have snow...except that two inches of snow here seems to be like a blizzard.  During my morning commute, I did not meet a snow plow until I was about 10 minutes from work.....I really needed to meet one (at least a sand or salt truck) when I pulled out of my driveway in my front-wheel drive car.  Oh well.  I made it to work in a record breaking hour and thirty minutes. 

When we all woke up this morning and discovered the snow, I was really glad that it was a dress down week at work.  So, I put on my jeans, a nice t-shirt (is there such a thing?), my trusty blue fuzzy (which Greg dreams of burning), and sneakers.  I am into wearing a jacket over a shirt lately because my right boob is now residing in its own zip code (we weaned the baby last week...so it has been a while).  One side of me looks sort of like Dolly Parton and the other side like Meg Ryan...in case you needed a visual.  If you didn't, I'm sorry.  Anyway, I didn't have any meetings, so it would just be me, my blue fuzzy, and my computer.  Oh, and Greg unearthed my giant yellow parka/ski jacket/whatever for me to wear.  I figured that if I was going to get stuck on the side of the road (it has happened before...Ted. G. Bolling Road, Wise, VA, winter 2009), I wanted to be warm.

I make it to work, and soon after I log on to my computer, which won't judge me based on my attire, I read an e-mail reminding me about the campus-wide staff/faculty lunch.  With the President.  So...me and my blue fuzzy, sneakers, and giant yellow coat are going to lunch with everyone else on campus.  Talk about insecurities.  There were people there in suits.  And ties.  And skirts.  And heels.  And then, there was me.  Easily visible in the giant yellow coat.  Oh well.  I did see one person in a bright red velour Christmassy, pajammy thing.  She and I should have had a table together. 

Friday, November 19, 2010

Where is my poop stored? And Other Awkward Questions

Anyone who's ever been remotely close to a 5 year old can tell you that they can come up with some really crazy stuff.  Kiley is no different.  Here is a small sampling of the latest interesting moments...

Q.  Mommy, I know that juice and water come out as tinkle and that is kept in my bladder, but is all food made into poop?  Where does my body keep poop? 
A.  Ask your dad (I could have added "Because he is full of it." but, I refrained.  It was difficult though.)

Q.  Do you have to live together when you are engaged?
A.  No, and you shouldn't, unless you really want to know what you are getting into before you get married.  Hmmmm....on second thought, yes, go ahead.  Try it out.  (Okay, so I didn't really say all of that, but I sure was thinking it!)

Q.  Do you have to have a ring to be engaged?
A.  Nope, but it doesn't hurt to have a really big rock on your finger to remind you why you love the person who gave it you.  (Okay, so that answer was embellished a little bit too.  What can I say?  I'm not genuinely funny like 5 year olds are.)

Q.  How do cats get married?
A.  They go to a church and a kitty priest marries them.

Q.  So then they can have babies?
A.  Yes.  But responsible mommy and daddy kitties get spayed and neutered so they don't contribute to the millions of stray kittens running around the world.

Q.  How do mommy cats have babies?
A.  Ask your dad. 

Okay, I think those are all the ones I can think of right now...but I do have a couple to tell on myself, just because they are funny.

I was talking to my dad the other day and I told him where the new house was.  Here is the conversation...

"So is that Calvary like the Crucifixion or cavalry like horses?" he asks.
"There's a difference?" Leah wonders out loud.  Dramatic pause where Leah remembers that she has an English degree and her dad, on the other end of the phone line, rolls his eyes and wonders if the money spent on Leah getting her English degree was worth it.
"Oh, right, right, the l is in a different place.  It is Calvary like Crucifixion." she says with more assurance than she actually has, probably trying to cover up the fact that she didn't know they were two different words and for the longest time wondered why they were spelled the same (even though now she knows they are not spelled the same) but meant completely unrelated things.  Whew!

Another funny word moment from Leah (someone probably needs to call the college she went to and make sure she did graduate.)

Greg went to a workshop the other day with an author who specializes in keeping kids interested in whatever teachers have to say.  He asked if I knew the author, and I said "The one who wrote Worksheets Don't Grow Dendroids?"  At this point Greg snorts and says "Dendrites, you mean?"  Yes, that is what I meant, although I guess I could have been referring to the Android version of Dendrites...Dendroids, you know? That is a dendrite on steroids.  Or a robot dendrite.  Or something...

Sigh....Hope will understand these missteps (especially because I am always asking her to proofread my stuff...she is the Grammar Goddess), and maybe my parents too, because I think I have a history of mixing up words...was it hupcake for cupcake?  And didn't I once say that I needed some gasoline on my tush (I think I meant vaseline).

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Video Clips

Disclaimer...you may want to take some anti-nausea medication before viewing...I am not the steadiest of videographers!


This video is entitled "The Chair Game."  Marianna is fascinated with chairs...she likes to crawl in and out of them and she doesn't seem to get bored with this...sometimes she gets a little stuck...which is funny/cute (dont' worry, we do rescue her). 

This one is just baby silliness.  We have a lot of silliness in our house...it is never ending.  Enjoy!

                                                                       More Silliness...


                                                             This clip is Baby Nascar...

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Some Updates

It has been a while since my last post, but no worries!  That just means there are more updates!  Here are a few...

Shorty-short-shorts are in at college...especially paired with knee-height fur boots.  Strange, if you ask me, but I'm not a college student.

Kiley seems to be getting into it with classmates who do not feel that her daddy's team is the best.  Here is a cut and pasted version of the conversation.

Note, Rick is the Athletic Director at the High School, and his wife, Goldy, works with elementary school kids...


Rick's wife was at Brookneal Ele. today working with Snack's class. Snack told Goldy (Rick's wife) that there was a boy in her class who liked the wrong team.


Goldy asked her who he liked.


Snack replied, "Philadelphia."


Goldy asked who Snack liked.


Snack responded, "William Campbell Generals."


Goldy told her it was all right if he liked Philadelphia because Philadelphia and William Campbell play in different leagues.

Ah, loyalty!

I have pasted a family portrait below, drawn by Kiley, of course.  You may need some clarification.  Greg sort of looks Amish, or maybe like a terrorist...I look like I just stuck my finger in a light socket, and Marianna looks like a, well, I'm not really sure.  It could be a bug, it could be a cat...not sure.  Is it strange that the only normal looking ones are Kiley and the animals?


When I told Kiley that I was going to post the portrait on the blog and that my hair was crazy, she said, "But Mommy, I fixed your hair!"  Oh, now I see.  Under the Medusa-like craziness, there is some straight stuff.  Now that I'm looking at what is supposed to be Marianna, it does kind of look like she might be bending down to pick something up (like a wad of hair) off the floor.  Sort of.  If you tilt your head the right way...and make your eyes go a little fuzzy. 

Shout out to Anty Riss!  Happy, happy birthday!!!!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Life on a College Campus

Oh how sheltered I have been....

Middle school and high school classrooms are kept in check by a number of rules.  One of my favorites is the "finger-tip rule."  As in, When standing straight with your arms hanging down by your sides, your skirt/shorts/whatever your bottoms are classified as must reach wherever your fingertips end.  And no, you cannot cheat by raising your shoulders.  Another rule that most students comply with (for fear of the principal's office, or mommies and daddies being called), is no cursing out loud. 

So, the college campus is a little different.  I have mentioned before that I really, really enjoy working here.  It is pretty, the atmosphere is great, I have a great boss (Love you Maggie!)...but sometimes the lull of happiness brought on by the smell of boxwood is shattered by reality.  These are young adults whose parents are not close enough to have an impact on clothing choice or what comes out of their children's mouths...and there are no principals to be afraid of.  The result?  The finger-tip rule is gone.  I think, actually, that some girls think that since they lived under the thumb of dress codes for so long that they are going to break out and experiment.  More power to you, girls.  Here comes the but.

Yesterday I had to forcibly stop myself from staring at some girl's booty.  Not because it was a nice booty that I would aspire to have, not because it was gigantic and blocking my view, but because it was HANGING OUT!!!!!  Seriously.  If I could see the bottom of her tush while she was standing up and I was in my car, what would happen if she sat down?  Where would the skirt go?  What would people see?  AHHHHH!  Where is the finger-tip rule?????

Okay, the cursing.  College students must feel like they are obligated to do this.  Maybe to make up for all the perceived violations to their freedom of speech that they experienced in K-12 education?  I don't know, but somebody needs to give them a bar of soap.  Seems like when I walk across campus to the post office, another building (okay, Starbucks), I hear conversations peppered with some very colorful speech.  They use the four letter s word like valley girls use "like."  Maybe they will grow out of it, or maybe they will at least start to lower their voices.  Oh well. 

I still like working on a college campus...I will just be more aware of people's rears and people's voices. 

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

A Few Pictures

Sleepy Friends
So Happy...
Greatest Big Sister Ever!
Baby Burrito-Three Days Old-Doesn't She Look Yummy!
Halloween 2009